Well well well.. where to start with this post.
So we are going to address these "rumors" (gag! the words rumor & gossip are so gross).
Let's backtrack a bit shall we?
I felt like a blog post was more appropriate in every shape and form because well I'm hot headed and once you get me off speaking my mind on a video, it's gonna get ugly!
PLUS, I keep my "saaammage" (main channel) focused only on all things beauty.
Nothing personal, and it's been that way for a loooong time.
In regards to my vlog channel, there I let viewers into my personal life a bit.
Yes mostly all you see me do is eat and do nothing but hey if you enjoy it feel free!
If you noticed, and I'm sure you have... I do not show my boyfriend ever.
Does he get caught in vlog channel footage from time to time?
Oh yes! Do I edit it out? Double yes!
Of course a lot of people automatically assume it's for some dark evil nasty reason.
Whatever those accusations may be, it's just a personal decision.
From the BOTH of us. Ultimately it is my channel and the bf would respect my decisions to keep our relationship out of the public eye even if we didn't agree. Luckily we do.
He doesn't enjoy being filmed anyway so enjoying each others company off camera is what we prefer to do.
For those wondering, he is a huge support of my channels and actually is the one who handles all my tech stuff and purchased me my HD camera last august.
Now onto the deeper issues.
So these pregnancy "rumors" are all based off a tweet. Yes admittedly a tweet I did post (for five minutes) in a conversation with a very nice follower who is a mom and 19 (her username was tagged and everything). I did insinuate that I am expecting and due in FEB 2012.
Guru Gossip (a ugly little forum that obviously focuses on attacking the lives, videos, and appearances of "gurus" kinda like hobby) does enjoy stalking the twitters and such of youtubers and screenshoting things to make their lives more entertaining.
They screenshotted the tweet that was up for 5 minutes for all of their readers.
Lovely right? Eh yeah I knew when I was typing the tweet it could happen but I thought...
Why let them ruin a conversation with a nice follower? I hesitated to post, but I did anyways.
(good job sam... -_-)
Regardless if it was up for 5 mins or 5 days everyone claims to have read it.
I reaaaally doubt everyone was on my main twitter page during those minutes.
Come on, face it.. you read guru gossip (tsk tsk tsk).
Is it true?!?! YES. It is true.
I am currently 13 weeks (3 months + 1 week) pregnant.
DUN DUN DUN.
Why haven't I said.. anything?!?
Lets be honest, I wasn't & still am not super excited about sharing this news.
Yes the news is wonderful, beautiful and exciting.
Youtube? Isn't any of those things...haha.
Don't get me wrong, I love my subscribers... 95% of them.
The 5% that watch to leave dirty comments or make hypocritical judgements?
I could do with out.
The majority of my viewers especially my long time ones are super sweet, supportive, non judgmental and people I'd love to meet in real life if I had the chance.
I agree with these lovely tweets.
I wasn't in a huge rush to share the news the second I found out (in June).
I actually didn't plan to announce any sooner than september.
WHY? -- because I wanted to make it through my first trimester (just in case I didn't want to get too many hopes up) which thank buddha I have. I also wanted to know the gender of the baby prior to the "big announcement". Which isn't till september.
Call me crazy but I preferred to tell everyone when I felt comfortable and felt the time was right.
Not to be pestered into "explaining myself" when I really don't have to.
But instead of living through another month of crazy comments.. here is the info your digging for.
Now lets address some of these comments that I have received
without me announcing anything, or confirming anything.
I know as people, we all see things differently.
We were raised different, have different views... morals.. etc.
Do I expect everyone to see things the way I see them? No way.
Do I hope most people have a decent level of respect for everyone and know when they are saying uncalled for things? I wish, doesn't happen.
So viewing what I have to read.
Let me clarify things from my personal point of view.
I think the first comment should be taken very seriously.
I keep my beauty channel focus on beauty.
I have never recommend anything harmful to any young viewers or viewers in general.
Am I preaching for my viewers to have kids at the same age as I will? NOPE.
To say this?
I never even mentioned my pregnancy to youtube.
And I don't plan on talking about it on my beauty channel either.
I also have never stated that I am an angel and the best role model for anyone.
I talk about beauty products, and the rare high school advice tip video...
I don't preach anything, and I don't think any of my videos up make me a bad role model.
Now to the second comment.
Something I never appreciated much was the "only 18" thing.
I've goten something before like "she young and stupid she's only 18".
Yes I am 18, yes I'll be 19 for literally 6 months of my child's life.
Then I won't be a "teen" anymore when I turn 20.
Will I suddenly know more about not being a stupid "teen" the hour I turn 20?
NO. Will it automatically make me super mom? NO.
ALSO - the only reason we all know my age is because I have recently reminded you of my age.
Everyone thought I was at least 20! I get the 23-25 assumption A LOT.
It's hypocritical for those who say that I am assumed earlier because I seem "mature, grown up and wise" for my age to then turn around and say I'm going to be a horrible mom because I'm a "stupid immature teen". It's VERY HYPOCRITICAL.
It is true I am not married currently. I will be legally married on paper before the year is over.
I am engaged (and have been for a while.. though I don't flash the rock around), the wedding ceremony is planned for May 12, 2012.
I have found and worn my dream dress and such but do you guys know that?
I have found and worn my dream dress and such but do you guys know that?
Nooooo because I haven't shared it with you yet!
It just ruins all the joy to have it come out like this.
But everything going on is very exciting and joyful and I'm happy.
That should be all that matters.
To the other comments shown, I appreciate your support and non judgmental viewers.
I don't ever talk about my career/job, or my boyfriend/fiance's life (he is not a teen or barely 20 for those wondering).. career.. age or anything.
We aren't anything like the cast of 16 and pregnant. TRUST ME.
(They are rich now, btw though they pretend they aren't... with new cars and ipads LOL)
Our families are supportive and I'm not struggling to graduate or anything.
Remember I graduated a while ago?
We are adults! Regardless of my 18/19 age title.
I will still be doing what I am doing now throughout my pregnancy.
Full time student, part time working.. and youtubing!
Still going to school this fall, taking a short break in spring (the baby will be born in the beginning of the spring semester).. and back to the books next summer.
Yes it will be tough, and straining on my body but luckily our house is veeeery close to my school and I do not doubt I can do it. If everything was easy, it all wouldn't be worth it in the end. I'm motivated.
I don't appreciate being told I'm going to be a bad mom.
Motherhood is stressful and tiring for everyone! It wouldn't be motherhood if it wasn't.
Yes I'll be a young mom, but I wouldn't even call myself a "teen mom".
That has too many negative assumptions. Just because I'll be nine-teen doesn't automatically put me in the same place as some who is sixteen.
Luckily we are very financially stable, have good stable careers, a good place to raise the baby and have everything well planned out.
I am not sitting around freaking out so I don't need any accusations that everything will be so horrible.
The baby will be very loved, very cared for and we will be a happy family.
I am very blessed to be so stable in my life to have the support that I do.
I do not plan on getting into deeper detail on anything else.
Thank you to those who respect my privacy and decisions...
and are excited for us.
I will probably do a monthly blog update about how things are going but I do not plan on ever ever ever talking about my pregnancy on my channel.
To those who are so filled with disgust and hatred.. I'm sorry you feel that way.
I hope you... see the light!
See you in a few months my little darling.
Taken TODAY.. at my 3 month appointment =D
P.S No baby bump to show yet! I still have a flat tummy with some definition left in my abs hehe. I went through lots of vomiting for the past 7 weeks. I haven't ever been good at gaining weight so it's not surprising I'm still at 88lbs... but the baby is perfectly healthy according to the doctors. No worries!